I've been away visiting my new nephew, who was adopted in South America and arrived home with his parents, my sister and her husband, last Saturday. It was a joyous meeting and reunion at the airport, with two new sets of grandparents, four aunties and two uncles, and assorted cousins, two of whom are themselves adopted. My sister honored Adonis and me by asking us to be the Goddess-parents; my nephew will also have godparents, both of whom are Christian, as his parents are (my sister Lutheran, her husband, Catholic). So call me a Goddessmother, or a fairy godmother. (Alas, "fairy godfather" sounds like a gay mobster, so Adonis will stick with "Goddessfather.")
What does it mean to be a Goddessparent? Well, first it means I welcomed him back and reminded him that earth is a beautiful place, that this is a good incarnation, and that he's safe. We'll hold an earth-based baby ritual for him - not a Wiccaning per se, since he'll also be baptized. I think my most important duty will be to encourage and help him to honor the earth. To tell him stories. Sing to him. Take him camping and hiking. Garden with him and teach him to compost. Give him a membership in an environmental organization.
What else could a fairy godmother do?
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I have a goddaughter, who is now 12 (soon to be 13). With her, I've done the basic stuff like taking her places her parents w/couldn't. I've also bought the things they were unable/unwilling to such as hike, commune with nature, etc.
I also let her do things her parents won't, like swear and drive my car (I live in a very rural area) and buy her dangling earrings which she wears when she visits.
Right now she's in her "difficult" stage so she's matting it hard to spend time with her by pouting and being silent. But I hope she moves out of this stage as quickly as she moved into it.
My sister loves to hike and camp; her husband doesn't, but I bet she'll be taking her son with her on some excursions. They're quite well-off economically, and they live in a somewhat conservative suburb in the Midwest, so even though my sister has liberal politics and an open mind, there will be other, more conservative forces at work on my nephew, including pressures to conform strictly to gender.
-Inanna (having trouble logging in)
I look forward to his hanging out with us in our crunchy college town, at Pagan festivals, in queer-friendly space - just so he's aware that there are alternatives. His choices, of course, will be his own.
Meanwhile, I'm the supplier of subversive children's books!
"gay mobster" that is so funny!
hmmm... what is a "wiccaning"? my children have not been baptised or anything else.
Well, I've never actually been to a Wiccaning, so I'm sure someone can answer your question better than I. It's a naming ceremony for the child, perhaps a welcoming to the earth, or into the faith, and promises made to the child. One tradition has it that the child is passed through a hole in a stone wall.
If I were going to do a Wiccaning, I would want it to be outside, if possible. I would name Goddess-parents, and bless the child with the elements, and welcome her back to earth, and promise to raise her with love and respect for the earth and its mysteries.
There must be some ideas in books out there. Also, I suspect a Wiccaning, like a baptism, can be done at any age.
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